Body Image and Self-Esteem

Why are we so unhappy with our bodies?

I don’t think any of us would disagree that we are under pressure to measure up to a certain social and cultural ideal of beauty, which can lead to poor body image. Images we see daily can reinforce an already negative opinion we have of our body, leading us to believe we are overweight and not able to meet the “perfect” American standard.

Family and friends can influence our body image with positive and/or negative comments. Doctors and other professionals also have a powerful impact on our body image. Their comments may be delivered as health advice, but if misinterpreted, affects how we perceive our body.

We all have days when we feel awkward or uncomfortable in our bodies. The key to developing positive body image is to recognize and respect our natural shape and learn to overpower those negative thoughts and feelings with positive, affirming, and accepting thoughts. Accept yourself. Accept your body. Celebrate yourself. Celebrate your body.

What is body image?

Slowly over time, you developed your body image based on what your family, boyfriend(s), and/or husband(s), coaches, and teachers told you. Add to that thousands of daily media messages from magazines, novels, television, music, and you start to believe that you’re fat or ugly. All these negative thoughts and beliefs can lead down a self-destructive path unless you know how to recognize and cope with them. A woman with a healthy body image respects her body, takes care of her body, and keeps her body in perspective.

What is self-esteem? Self-esteem is defined as “a confidence and satisfaction in oneself.” It is your overall evaluation of your self-worth and how you value your own attributes. How high or low your self-esteem is depends on how you compare what you’d like to be with how you actually see yourself.

Research shows that girls lose twenty-three percent of their self-esteem between elementary and middle school. A study by the American Association of University Women found only twenty-nine percent of high school girls were happy with themselves.

Psychologists describe key components of self-esteem as how you evaluate yourself in terms of important characteristics like what you are good at, what you are not so good at, and the kinds of situations you prefer or avoid.

Most of our feelings about ourselves are built into us in childhood. If we were fortunate to have loving parents who conveyed our worth in their relationship to us, and if we grew up in a safe environment with positive relationships with peers, teachers, and role models, then it is likely we will feel reasonably good about ourselves. However, if faced with negative influences in childhood, it may not take much to tip the balance the other way.

“The body is a sacred garment. It’s your first and last garment; it is what you enter life in and what you depart life with, and it should be treated with honor.” –Martha Graham

Read this excerpt from “I’m Beautiful? Why Can’t I See It?” by Kimberly Davidson.